I don't know why I get so nervous or allow myself to get so anxious about photographing families. I've known this family ever since we moved to Fayetteville and these girls are near and dear to my heart. I had such fun goofing around with Sandra and Morgan, they truly made me less nervous, never knowing that I had butterflies racing around in my stomach. But I used my voice, directing everyone with their posing and counting down to three and yelling, "open your eyes!" . I realized walking back to my car afterwards, that there's a part of me that feels selfish for not wanting to photograph others outside my little family (and Dana and Ali and Ellie are definitely a part of our little family, so they don't count), for not wanting to give up part of my day to spend time taking pictures, even family pictures of dear friends of mine. I mean, isn't that just so, so selfish? For some crazy reason, that realization made me feel a little bit better, like I figured out a piece of the anxiety that goes into theses sessions. Maybe now that I've realized that little nugget, I can begin to calm my nerves down a bit if another family asks me to take their photos. I come away from these sessions a bit more confident each time. I am good, I know what I'm doing (or I'm really good at faking it!) and I know how to work my camera. To finally admit that feels good. Maybe I'm beginning to finally believe in myself.
Today was just sheer fun. And that makes everything good.