On Owning It

There's been a lot of talk about "authenticity", being true to yourself, owning it. Talk about not comparing yourself to others, but to be original. I've been in that Comparison Trap lately, that Trap that clamps down on you hard and won't let you go. The whispers from deep within you begin cutting you down, telling you that your not as good as you think you are and who are you kidding? It's an easy and oh, so tempting Trap to get caught in. I read other photographers words about their creativity, how it just seems to flow through them like a river and other photographers about their "passion" for this "craft" (such overused words!!!) that we allowed ourselves to get caught up in. I think maybe I should go cruise the streets with my camera, exploring back alleys and take cool, hippster photos of bicycles that sport baskets filled with fresh flowers or decrepit old buildings with ivy trailing across the sides (actually, that would be kind of cool to photograph). 


But I'm not that cool, hipster person. I'm pretty much a home body, stopping the vacuum to take pictures of his sleeping buddy and the shadows that drape themselves over my new crate of goodies from yesterday's trip to the thrift store. I thought a lot today about what it is that makes me happy behind the camera. I like adventures, getting out and exploring Fayetteville and other towns around here - - - I do get stir crazy after awhile of being in the house every day - - - but it's the playing with the light beams and the quiet of the shadows that I love. When I capture shadows in a picture, it's like I'm capturing peacefulness itself.  

Light is a fantastic toy to play with on a hot afternoon. You can play with existing light or make your own, and when you make your own, it doesn't matter what time of day it is. 

That is so cool. 

And when you nail a lighting technique that you've been fighting with for months and months, it's the best feeling in the world.

I don't want to be like everyone else, to play the social media games that they play. It takes up too much time, time that I could be spending taking pictures, chasing shadows on the wall, trying out lighting scenarios, brainstorming my next photograph (I've found that when I'm out walking Langley, that's when the creative ideas start flooding my brain. I unconsciously pick up speed as I sort through the idea, only coming to the surface and back to the Real World when Langley starts lagging behind, panting loudly and throwing dirty looks my way). 

I guess what I'm trying to say is if I have to be "passionate" about something, it's light, it's shadows, it's learning and throwing myself headfirst into the deep end to soak it all up.

That's what I want to own.